Showing posts with label Death. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Death. Show all posts

Monday, June 21, 2010

Enjoying June

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I’m on a roll…June is still going really well! I told you guys, didn’t I! I said June was going to be a great month and it truly has been. Here are a few notables:

This past Friday I got a new tattoo that I absolutely love! For those of you who didn’t know, I already had 2 and they are both super meaningful to me, but this third one is even more special. I got the word “Fuerza” on my left wrist which means Strength and Power in Spanish. I got it for a couple of different reasons, but the deciding factor was the recent passing of my Abuelo. If you read my May 31st “There is no place like home” post, you already know the story of my grandfather and what an amazing person he was. You know that he was a strong and courageous man who sacrificed a lot for his family. Although he will never be forgotten tattoo or not, every time I look at it, I will think of him and what a wonderful man he was and how lucky I am to be a part of such an amazing family. As far as the placing of the tattoo, that has meaning as well. Many people have asked me why I choose to put a tattoo on my wrist of all places. While I do understand that it is a very showy or obvious place for a tattoo, I don’t really care. Here is a little anecdote to explain my reasoning: I spent many days/nights in April and May crying myself to sleep. My Abuelo had been in and out of the hospital and nursing homes since March and every time I received an update regarding his health, it didn’t seem like he was getting better. I was well aware of the fact that he wouldn’t be with us for much longer and it absolutely broke my heart that I wasn’t there during the little time he had left. I felt selfish for going on with my life in New York, while he and the rest of my family were going through so much back home in Kansas. Once he actually passed, I spent hours, many of which were on a plane, with my head in my hands crying. I had to tell myself many of times to just be strong and that I would get through this. So when I decided to get this tattoo I wanted to get it in a place where when I’m sad or upset and crying about something and my head is in my hands, I would see it and remember to have strength. So really, my tattoo has a double meaning. The word “Fuerza” is a description of my grandfather, but it’s also a reminder to myself, the emotional person that I am, to be strong because no matter what happens in life, I can and will get through it.

Fuerza, aka Strength

This past weekend was fabulous. Friday night after I got my tattoo I headed to Happy Hour at XES. As always, we enjoyed the 2 for 1 drink special. After HH we headed to Pongsri for dinner. Pongsri is a Thai restaurant that many of our friends work at. It is absolutely delicious! We had a great meal and then headed to Limmerick’s, which is a bar we frequent on Friday nights after HH. After 2 rounds of Irish Car Bombs we decided to call it a night! It was a super fun night with a diverse group of people. There were 7 of us, all from different places around the world: Australia, Germany, USA (me), Scotland, Switzerland, Thailand, and Mexico (Martin). Isn’t that bizarre? Like I mentioned before, the diversity in NYC is one of the many reasons I love it here. Saturday morning was a struggle for both my Tio and me. We were regretting those car bombs the night before, that’s for sure. We managed to get up and get ready for a BBQ at a park in Brooklyn. It was a friend of ours’ birthday so we had no choice but to deal with our hangovers the best way we know how, so we got to the park and drank more, lol. By mid-afternoon we were both doing great and enjoying a beautiful Saturday at East River State Park in Williamsburg, Brooklyn. It was a nice park with awesome views of the Manhattan skyline. We were with many Asian people from Japan, China, Korea, and Thailand so this was no hotdog and hamburger barbeque. Instead we grilled fish, shrimp, chicken heart, Korean steak, and a variety of other things. Although I was skeptical of a few things, I tried everything and everything was delish! Overall, it was a great weekend in the city! :)

From left: Australia, Germany, USA, Scotland, Switzerland, Mexico, Thailand

German friend, Gernot & Me

Manhattan Skyline from East River Park in Brooklyn

Yummy BBQ

Enjoying June!

Ayako, me, and Rin

Beautiful sunset

One last thing, yesterday was my dad’s 51st birthday so Happy Birthday Dad! Also, with today being Father’s Day I would like to say Happy Father’s Day to all Dads, especially the greatest of all, mi Padre! In addition to all that today is my parents’ 29th wedding anniversary so Happy Anniversary Mom and Dad. You guys are wonderful role models and the reason I believe in happily ever after. And last, but not least, tomorrow, Monday, June 21 is my best friend Val’s 22nd birthday so Happy Birthday Val! I hope you have the wonderful birthday celebration that you deserve! I am sorry to all of you that I can’t be there to help celebrate all these great occasions, but just know that I’m constantly thinking about you guys. I love you all very much!

Happy Birthday and Father's Day to the best Dad

Happy Anniversary Mom & Dad

Happy Birthday Val!

Monday, May 31, 2010

There’s no place like HOME

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First of all, I apologize for the lack of posts lately, a lot has been going on and I just haven’t found the time or the motivation to write. Thanks to the long weekend, I finally have the time and energy to catch up on things, including updating this blog. So here it goes.

On Friday May, 14 I left work early and headed home to pack my suitcase and head to the airport. I couldn’t have been more excited to go home. Not only was it a chance to spend time with my family, but it was the weekend of KU’s Graduation Ceremony. I arrived late Friday night and the festivities began early Saturday morning. The day started off with my mom making breakfast for me and my sisters before we headed to the nail salon to get pedicures. After the pedicures, I headed to my sister Kim’s house to check out the new baby nursery. It looks amazing, of course. It was so nice to see Baby R’s room put together and it made me really excited to have a new nephew this July! Afternoon hit and my family and I headed downtown to attend my cousin Michaela’s college graduation from Rockhurst University. Shortly after, my parents and I headed to Lawrence to attend the Multicultural Scholarship Graduation Banquet held at the Kansas Union. I was a part of the KU MSP Scholars Program during my 3 1/2 year college career so it was nice to go back and attend a banquet honoring myself and my fellow senior scholars. Just to give you an idea of what the scholarship program is all about, here is our mission: The mission of the MSP is to recruit undergraduate students from under-represented backgrounds into various academic majors as a means of increasing the diversity of the student body at the University of Kansas and to provide supports and opportunities that will assist them in their academic success. Needless to say, we enjoyed the banquet and it was a proud moment for my parents and me. After the banquet, I headed to Linwood for my best friend Val’s Graduation Party. It was SO NICE to see Val, especially because I hadn’t seen her in a while. Have I ever mentioned that living thousands of miles away from your best friend isn’t easy? I am SO proud of her accomplishments and have no doubt in my mind that she is going to do great things with her career! After a VERY long and eventful Saturday, I headed home to get a good night’s sleep before Sunday’s Commencement Ceremony.

Sunday came and I headed to Lawrence for graduation. Although I technically graduated in December, it was really nice to “walk the hill” as it gave me a sense of accomplishment and fulfillment! The tradition of walking through the campanile and down the hill symbolizes a student’s journey through life. We might all have taken different paths, but in the end, we are at the bottom of the hill with the achievement of a college degree from one of the greatest universities in the nation. I am so glad I decided to come home to participate in graduation as I finally and completely felt done. Even though I already finished classes and started my first job, I still feel like graduation was the final end to a wonderful chapter in my life. Not to mention that after 3 1/2 years of working my butt off to maintain good grades and further my education, a celebration was much deserved. It was also a proud moment for the Zarate family as I am the 3rd and last daughter to have graduated from the University of Kansas with a Bachelor of Science Degree in Journalism: Strategic Communication. As both Kim and Andrea pointed out in their blogs, it’s pretty damn awesome to be a trio of Jayhawk sisters! :)

Sunday evening after graduation, my parents and sisters threw me a little graduation party complete with food, drinks, friends and family. It was so unbelievably nice to celebrate with the people I care about the most, especially because I don’t see those people as frequently as I would like. Just about every one of my best friends came which whether they are aware of it or not, made my day!

Val and me about to walk through the Campanile

Proud Parents

Jayhawk Sisters

Zarate Family of Jayhawks

Robbins family and me

The Elmer family and me

Me and the kiddos

Grandma Starks and me

My girls!

Sunday night came to an end with a sleepover. I have been promising Jaxson since I was home in March that the next time I came home to visit we could have a sleepover together. Considering the busy weekend we had, by Sunday night we were both beat. We popped in a DVD and were both out in no time! Before Jax fell asleep we had this conversation:

“Wesa, I love when we have sleepovers when you’re not in New York.” – Jaxson
“I know buddy, me too because I love you sooo much.” – Me
“Wesa, when are you going to come back forever and not ever go back to New York?” – Jaxson
“I don’t know buddy, maybe in a couple of years, but no matter what I will always come visit you when I can because I love you.” – Me
“I know, I love you too.” – Jaxson

It was so adorable! Monday morning came all too soon and I woke up to spend a little bit of time with Jaxson and Audrina before I had to go. I seriously love those kids like they are my own! Being an aunt is one of the best jobs in the world and I can’t wait to have another nephew to adore.

Before I headed to the airport, I went with my dad to visit my abuelo (grandfather) who was just moved home from the hospital after being in and out of the hospital and a nursing home since March. It was a very difficult visit as my abuelo wasn’t doing too well and I was very aware that this might be the last time I would ever see him. It was unbelievably hard to say good bye. As I sat there sobbing watching him sleep I told my dad that I didn’t want to leave to go back to New York because I just had a feeling that as soon as I left, I would have to come right back and unfortunately, I was right. I did indeed fly back to New York Monday night on one of the longest and most difficult flights of my life. I cried from the moment I got to the airport to the time the plane landed 3 1/2 hours later. I just knew in my gut that I would never see my abuelo again and it broke my heart. I managed to gather myself, get my luggage, and take a taxi cab home. I went to bed that night with a heavy heart and it only got worse Tuesday morning when I received a phone call from my mother that my abuelo had past away. My Tio and I booked the next flight out and before I knew it, I was right back there in Kansas City at my abuela’s house crying all over again because my abuelo was gone. Standing there crying in the presence of just about my entire family was one of the worst moments in my entire life as everyone was so heartbroken and so sad about losing such an important person in their lives.

I know that most of you reading this understand how unbelievably difficult it is to lose someone who impacted your life so greatly, and for the Zarate family, it was harder than words can explain. You see, my abuelo was nothing short of an extraordinary man with unending compassion and a heart of gold. He made sacrifices that you and I have never even thought of. He left his wife and 8 kids in Mexico in order to take a cabinet making job in the United States and pave the way for a better life for him and his family. It took 3 long years before he was reunited with his family who were all legally accepted into the United States. He made the sacrifice of not being with his wife and all his kids who he loved so dearly because he didn’t want his family to have to live in poverty like he did. He wanted to come to the land of opportunity and live the American dream so that all his kids and grandkids, and great grandkids could have a better life and a better education to make something of themselves. Thanks to him, I was able to go to college and graduate with a degree. Thanks to him, I have never been poor. Thanks to him, I have endless opportunities to do something great with my life. He is the reason I am so proud to be a Mexican-American and the reason I have spent so much time trying to learn Spanish. All I wanted was for him to be proud of me and thankfully, I can say that when I returned from Spain, I had a great conversation with my abuelo ALL in Spanish. That, along with so many others, is a moment I will never forget. Both of my sisters have said it better than I (Andrea's Blog & Kim's Blog). Sadly, even all 3 of our descriptions combined can’t describe how wonderful of a man my abuelo truly was, but one thing is clear, he will forever be loved and dearly missed!

And so as I conclude on this Memorial Day weekend, I want to say thank you to both of my grandfathers for impacting my life in such a positive way. You both are loved and missed by so many!

Te amo y te extraño abuelo, que en paz descanse